In a constant pursuit to the root cause of rampant and scandalous male hatred in the society, popularly known as “Misandry”, it often makes us wonder why the concept of men’s rights invokes, humor, curiosity and then dismissal of the concept as men’s rights are apparently not needed in a patriarchal male dominated society!
And in such an atmosphere, one that reeks of misandry, when one talks about community center for victimized and distressed men being run, it sure sparks a debate – “Are there enough men getting victimized?” And many more similar questions which are nothing but sweet sarcasm on the initiatives to support victimized and distressed men and are glaring examples of misandry.
Reactions like, “Yeah, I agree that the women-centric laws are being misused, but more women suffer than men and that is the reason these laws are being misused.” Or worse, “I think, we should tolerate some misuse since women have suffered since centuries”, clearly tell us that there is a huge gap in education in the society when it comes to understanding men or their problems.
Ironically, the people who have least understanding of the male psyche or of the issues that face the male world tend to preach sermons to men and formulate laws and policies that not only govern the lives of men but also dictate and control it resulting in many innocent men living a compromised, ruined, and pernicious life.
Vague and misunderstood terms like patriarchy and male dominated society are used more often than not to deny men their due right to peaceful existence and victimized men are treated like criminals and punished.
And amidst this entire melee, chaos and misunderstanding, the key question still remains unanswered is – “Are victimized and distressed men a Camouflaged Majority or a Disguised Minority?”
Before seeking an answer to this question, we must resolve the existing educational gap in the understanding of victimization of men.
It’s victimization of men when,
- Men are told to man-up and tolerate an abusive wife
- Men are told to pamper their abusive wives by buying gifts for them when he complains of abuse from her.
- Men are told to marry a woman merely because the marriage is fixed, even when the man has realized that the woman is abusive but he is told that it would ruin a girl’s life.
- Men are told to keep their wives happy and make sure she never cries.
- Men are expected to marry their girlfriends in order to be socially relevant.
- Men are ridiculed for being sensitive or emotional.
- Men are expected to behave like a macho with other men in the presence of a woman.
- Men are driven to commit suicide as no one takes their problems seriously and blame them for the problems.
- False cases against men are projected as “Crime against Women” and stricter laws against men are sought and passed as well.
- Hard earned money of men is siphoned off to women in the name of social justice and empowerment.
- When they are expected to bottle-up their emotions and not express them too much.
- Men are judged from their financial status and wherewithal in life.
- Men are considered unmanly if they are not aggressive or violent.
- Jokes are made on those instances which actually hurt a man.
- Men’s problems are given a cold insensitive treatment.
These and many other exemplary social behaviors can be isolated which stand out as stark victimization of men and yet they are either passed off as individual problems or collateral damage of patriarchy.
Patriarchy oppresses men more than anything else. The patriarchs think it’s a man’s duty to protect a woman and in that process even get killed and then glorify such deaths to protect their own misogyny.
This self-induced guilt of patriarchal men is the biggest enemy of men themselves. And due to this guilt, a huge and vast majority of victimized and distressed men is camouflaged as non-caring, insensitive and abusive men. In reality, they are victimized and distressed.
In light of the above discussion, it can be conveniently concluded that victimized and distressed men are not at all a minority. If at all it appears so, it’s a disguised minority. A minority disguised in the clutches of patriarchy. Yes, you heard it correct. It’s the conservative patriarchal approach of the society because of which victimized and distressed men appear as a minority.
As a result, only a handful of victimized and distressed men get an opportunity to voice their concerns while a vast majority camouflaged under the superficial concept of a male dominated society continues to suffer in silence and get punished openly.
Victimized and distressed men are the camouflaged majority, they aren’t the disguised minority.