Divorce Petition of a Frustrated Software Engineer

This is a work of fiction.

What if, a software engineer going through a bad marriage drafts a divorce petition containing statements like,

  1. My wife is behaving like an uncompiled variable throwing runtime exceptions.
  2. Every time I expect a performance from my wife, she throws an exception.
  3. I tried my level best to debug my wife but could not.
  4. The debugger crashes with null pointer exception when the variable called “Salary” becomes “0”.
  5. I can’t “Step-Into” her.
  6. She keeps on “Stepping-Over” me.
  7. I want to “Step-out” of this marriage.
  8. The “Break-Points” are too slippery.
  9. Once suspended, she resumes with great cost.

10.  Maintenance cost is very high and upgrade is impossible.

11. Uncalled for viruses have got installed under the package “in-laws” and every time I try to uninstall the package it says, “Administrator privileges required to perform the operation. Please contact your system administrator”.

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