Married Men top the list of suicides’

In continuation with my previous article “Husbands Committing Suicide 4 times faster than Wives” the analysis of the suicide data for the year 2010 continues in conjunction with the suicide data of previous years as well.

Here are some interesting figures.

Hence, we see that year after year the contribution by married men, to the total number of suicides, forms the “Single Largest Contribution” with a clear indication that married men top the list of suicides’.

Before jumping to conclusions, let us have a look at some more data.

In the above figure women outnumber men in suicides only after being divorced, which means marriage and separation from marriage is extremely dangerous and fatal for men.

Let us also look at a 15 year trend of the number of suicides committed by married men vis-à-vis married women.

Now the message is loud and crystal clear; while suicides by married women have remained more or less constant, those for married men are on the upward trend and suicides by married men have always been way ahead than those by married women.

In 15 years over 776812 married men have been laid down at the altar of marriage vis-à-vis 453,160 which means the ratio of suicides for married men: married women is 1.714 i.e. over a period of 15 years 1.714 times married men have lost their lives vis-à-vis married women.

That being said, the reality is that despite the fact as a trend and a pattern, though it’s the men who have suffered more in marriages, we have special laws to protect women and none to protect men.

Forget protecting, year after year newer and newer anti-male laws are being proposed or passed to corner, castrate and disempower men all the more. Any law that is made to “protect a woman”, in reality, protects women less and attacks men more.

This is nothing but a sheer display of hatred towards the male gender. Apart from laws, even our existing societal attitudes are largely anti-male. Laws are a direct reflection of social attitudes and it’s the social mindset that works against men and refrains from favoring them. Even if a woman commits a crime, she is let off that after all, “She is a woman” and even if a man is innocent, he is forced to prove his innocence with the premise that after all “He is a man”.

It is not uncommon to see the glaring disparity of reportage when it comes to crimes committed by women and men. If a crime committed by a woman is reported, an inadvertent justification for the crime follows and in majority of the cases the woman is still projected as a “liberated victim” and the crime is hailed as a bold step by the woman. However, the same for a man is reported as if the man had a passion to commit crimes and but obvious, the woman would be the victim here. Also, often identities of women are protected in both the scenarios and the identity of the man is never protected.

It is such stereotypical gender-based assumptions that are harming men to such an extent that we are seeing the above figures. And with the above figures, one message is very clear – “Marriage is a crime for men in India”.

The very fact that married men top the list of suicides should be a factor motivating enough for the Govt. of India to constitute a National Commission for Men and a Men’s Welfare Ministry and allocate adequate budget in order to study the problems of men, devise solutions and redress mechanisms and implement the same with a single objective of reducing suicides by men.

The biggest problem that men face in the society is the absence of a proper communication channel. And such dire is the need of this communication channel that a few dedicated men’s rights activists from Bangalore have come up with the idea of establishing community centers for distressed and victimized men. Confidare Indian Men’s Rights Community Center is one such community center that has started its operations in Bangalore since May 2011 and is the first ever community center for men till date. Over 50 men in Bangalore have benefitted from its services and memberships so far. One of the clear responses of the members, after attending a few sessions at the community center, was that they felt very peaceful and relaxed.

Men’s Rights Activists in Bangalore believe that the establishment of more and more such community centers across India is the key to the growth of the men’s rights movement in India and to provide a semblance of a communication channel to distressed and victimized men till the time the society and the Govt. does not consider it as their duty to do so.

I end this article with a wish that in coming years, men should not top the list of suicides.

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