Gender wars have been at the core of the societal imbalance since ages immemorial. And these wars have been largely instrumental in the design and state of the society. All major societal structures like relationships, obligations, social and moral responsibilities revolve around this concept of gender wars. Various behavioral patterns and social norms are also laid down in and around this concept of Gender wars.
By and large the society is what we see today a result of these conflicts arising out of daily life. But now we have a million dollar question, as to what exactly is the society and who actually comprise of it? How has the so called ‘contractors of the society’ been given the authority to rule the lives and decision of so many other people and in reality who actually are the ‘contractors of the society’? What laid to the installation of the fear of social ostracization amongst folks so that a certain set of activities are doomed as ‘unacceptable’ in the society and the people of the clan always take care to see that the banned set of activities is not encouraged in the society? And a plethora of such questions do certainly irk the rationale as one analyzes the evolution of the society.
As a general observation and a rule of thumb, every person in the society defines “The Society” to be comprising of the people around oneself excluding oneself. Thus, the society actually becomes a very convenient scapegoat for wrongful decisions or the need for strict adherence to certain practices without understanding its essentialities or consequences.
If a girl runs away with the neighborhood boy, the family is more concerned about its position in the society rather than the girl’s emotions and feelings and even if she returns, the family is more happy about restoring the ‘apparently lost’ position. If the girl asks the question about her feelings and emotions or expects them to be reciprocated by the family, the family is actually at a loss of answers and thus conveniently passes the blame to the society, saying ‘It is not acceptable in our society’.
If a boy does not perform so well in his studies or his career, then also the family is more concerned about its repercussions on the societal position rather than trying to understand the reasons of his non – performance. Or to make an attempt to understand his actual area of interest and give him a chance to perform in that area. On the other hand, the family pressurizes him to get results as they are ‘losing position’ in the society. And if the boy asks the question about his own interests, then also the blame is very conveniently passed to the society, saying, ‘If you want to stay in this society, you have to stay according to it’.
The whole concept of society has been so deceptively conceived to pass on certain ubiquitously stereotypic histrionics generation over generation, that now the very basic question, the one raised above is very difficult to answer. It is not hard to find people talking ill of the society, cribbing about the wrongs happening in the society, the rising crime, the growing apathy, the dwindling commitment in relationships, the increasing commercialization leading to severe breach of trusts and so on and so forth. But at the same time, it is equally hard to find a dedicated team of committed people ready to take the responsibility to set at least one of them correctly. Again, in the process of cribbing and complaining, people pass the blame to the society thinking that everyone else other than themselves forms the society and being responsible for the mess, should clear it.
With everyone thinking themselves not to be a part of the society this whole concept of society, which actually finds its seeds in the dire need to establish civilization, remains present in a very inconspicuous form. Like a mirage in a desert, visible from a distance, and disappearing fast as one approaches it. Similarly for the problems faced by the civil society at present, a superficial glance will always depict that the society itself is responsible for the mess. But if analyzed closely, it boils down to the question, whether everyone actually does consider oneself as part of the society and ready to take one’s responsibility in setting right things right. And had everyone actually done it, the society as it stands today, would have been in a much better shape and form, if the society actually existed outside us. It does not. It exists within us. Each one of us is the society and each one needs to put in efforts to stabilize the swinging pendulum of societal chaos.
It is still not late. We can do it now. We will do it now. For its now or never.